This Is Where I'm At

Things I'm Finding Infinitely Enjoyable:

• Saturdays with no scheduled events. It has been at least a month since I've enjoyed a lazy Satruday morning. And even though I just spent 3 hours cleaning the kitchen -- the heavy duty cleaning that involves the oven AND the deep, dark depths of cupboards -- I did it on my terms and because I felt like it. Which is a lovely feeling. Too bad I can't get around to cleaning Mr. Rochester's bowl.

• The following songs: Hey Julie by Fountains of Wayne, Creepin' In by Norah Jones and Dolly Parton, You Make Me Feel Like Dancing by Leo Sayer, Mexico by James Taylor, Have You Met Miss Jones by Robbie Wiliams, and Baba O'Riley by The Who. I think you should all check them out for yourselves if you haven't heard them.

• Ballet flats. I love the fact that you can find them everywhere these days and have acquired a basket full of them already this summer. They are perfect for work, especially in an office where every day is jean day.

• Target.com. I am 70 miles from the nearest Target and it makes it bearable to browse the store's wares from my bedroom. Also I ordered this adorable pair of ballet flats and this new messenger bag. My old messenger bag (the one I bought in a shop called Oasis in Whitely's in London) followed me through the past 8 years and has been to England, Ireland, Scotland, Washington D.C., Utah, and Washington state with me. Sadly it has seen better days and I would like to keep it as a souvenir, rather than let it disintegrate into oblivion.

• My bed. I know I've talked about how lovely it is before but I thought I should reiterate how much I love my bed. I'm seriously not in it enough and part of my reasoning in saving for a laptop is that I can be on the computer in bed.
  

• I'm hearing that there will be 30 episodes of The Office next season. How wonderful is that? I'm obsessed with the show and having that many episodes of Jim & Co. will make it so much grander.
  

• Still being able to be irresponsible. Thursday night I stayed up WAY past my bedtime to see John Krasinski on Conan. I'm sure staying up until 1:30 am is not the best thing for me, but not only is Mr. Krasinski rocking his new, shorter, hair, I also got to hear a story about George Clooney. That is killing two obsessions with one stone! Check out Give Me My Remote for the video.

• Graham crackers. I never bought them when I lived on my own and I forgot how much I liked them. It really is the simple things in life.

Things That Annoy Me To No End

• Overly air-conditioned offices that require you to wear winter clothes to work just so your hands don't turn blue and fall off.

• The band Hinder. Their lead singer always looks like he is in the middle of a seizure and they sing stupid songs about being two-timing toolbags. This only serves to remind me about my friend's two-timing toolbag ex whom I loathe with the passion of a thousand fiery suns.
  

• Making life-altering decisions. Even the smallest decisions -- like where to get my hair cut -- fills me with confusion. Making huge decisions about where to go and what to do with the rest of my life just make me want to curl into a ball under the covers and hide.
  

• People who insist you make friends with their children. Especially when said children are much younger and live very sheltered lives. It is also annoying for the parents to nag you about it at your mother's funeral. Incidentally, these are the same people who thought it appropriate to highlight my Singleton status at the funeral. Good times.
  

Summer Solstice

The arrival of summer solstice never fails to make me melancholy. I should be excited about the longest day of the year, the hours and hours of sunshine that make up summer. I do love the hours of sunshine, but there is also the sense that summer is slipping away. I look back at what I have been doing every summer and it is usually nothing. I work and I go to church and I catch a few movies, but nothing to write about in the "How I Spent My Summer" essay everyone, whether in school or out, has to present every fall. I haven't traveled, I haven't seen anything of interest, I have just worked and eaten and slept, which makes it no different than any other time of the year. And I have no great plans for the remainder of this summer, just working and eating and sleeping, the usual. I have no way to savor the remaining days of summer, the remaining hours of sunlight and warmth, before the autumn arrives and hints at the impending winter hibernation.

Random Thoughts

I am completely scatterbrained lately, for obvious reasons, and have not been able to put a coherent thought together, so here are a bunch of random thoughts.

-- I realized last week that I actually like my job. I know! I haven't felt that in, well, ever. I'm training to take on another position and am actually feeling like a part of a company. Such a new and wonderful feeling.

-- I forgot how beautiful this place could be in spring and early summer, before the weather hits 90+. The green of the circles, the smell of freshly-cut hay and growing mint, the contrast between the irrigated fields and the dry edges. The blue of the sky. I'll have to take pictures to share with you all.

-- Everyone should go see Ocean's 13 because it is just plain fun. Plus, it is two hours of George Clooney, whom I adore, and lots of other nice-looking men who I know lots of people enjoy looking at, but who fade into the background when compared to my beloved George. Don't mock, I know I'm obsessed and I'm fine with it.

-- People should not tell me, in all seriousness and with no HINT of humour and/or sarcasm, that my mother can now help me find my eternal companion. EVER. It is not comforting and is rather insulting. Like I need divine intervention or I am completely unmarriageble. Hello?

-- I am completely addicted to caffeinated sodas. I crave them on a daily basis. I really must do something about this, but as I'm still exhausted after sleeping from 10:30pm to 7:15am, I don't really know what.

-- Even though I like my job, I still feel I'm being punished every morning when I have to drive to work and none of the children are going to school. I think we should ALL get June through August off.

The Interview

Well, I interviewed for the director/manager position at the museum and art center today. It went well, considering, but it is still the longest long shot. I don't have any conservation or preservation experience and have never actually worked in a museum. I was totally honest about this, of course. We'll see what happens in the next week or two. I'll keep you posted.

Death is not extinguishing the light; it is only putting out the lamp because the dawn has come.

Rabindranath Tagore

Things That Suck

Watching helplessly as your mother fades farther and farther away from you.

Watching helplessly as your father watches helplessly as your mother fades farther and farther away from him.

Remembering exactly what is happening to your family upon waking up from the blissful oblivion of a nap.

Listening to the seconds click by on the clock as you sit and watch your mother struggle to breathe.

Knowing it is going to get worse before it gets better. And that your definition of 'better' is still completely horrible.